For Crying Out Loud By Cheryl Frampton
BATTERED BY TWO HUSBANDS, I BEAT THE CYCLE OF FEAR. I LEARN'T HOW TO LET GO OF THE EMOTIONS ATTACHED TO PAINFUL MEMORIES FOREVER- IF I CAN DO IT THEN BELIEVE ME YOU CAN.
WHEN CHERYL FRAMPTON’S HUSBAND STARTED TO HIT HER, SHE LOST HER LOVE,HER PRIDE AND EVEN HER BABY SON……. BUT, DESPITE THE BLOWS, SHE REFUSTED TO BE BEATEN.
You’re a piece of crap and crap should be treated like crap!” my husband Luke shouted at me.
He delved into the toilet bowl, pulled out a handful of his recent bowel movement and wiped it all over my face. Then he threw me to the floor and stormed off.
It may seem ridiculous to those who haven’t been in an abusive relationship- why did I get myself in such a mess and why did I put up with it? Before it happened to me, I thought the same.
I thought women were mad or pathetic for letting a man hit them. While I’ve been beaten senseless by abusive torturers more times than I can count, it wasn’t just me who suffered. My little boy saw a lot of it, and ultimately got beaten too. I was kicked in the stomach regularly when I was pregnant and my second son died just after he was born.
To Luke I was useless and often he would send his heavy boot into my ribs telling me all the time I was nobody and never would amount to anything. He would laugh at me rolling on the floor crying and covered in blood. “ What are you doing on the floor still, you stupid bitch” he’d laugh.
The incidents were many, from emotional to mental abuse and resulting in physical abuse. I tried to get help from my mother; all she would do was tell me “ I had made my bed so lie in it”. Eventually, I left and found a safe place to go whilst I tried to come to terms with what was happening to me and my son.
It took everything I had to make that phone call to seek help. I was desperate.
The above incidents were but a fraction of what happened to me whilst living with an abusive man. You would have thought I would have learnt not to repeat the cycle and not to go back. I did both.
Eventually, I taught myself how to break the cycle and why I attracted those men in the first place.
Know this: YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO BE TREATED WITH DISRESPECT OR EMOTIONAL, MENTAL OR PHYSCIAL ABUSE OF ANY KIND. KNOW THAT YOU ARE WORTHY AND SO ARE YOUR CHILDREN IF YOU HAVE THEM.
KNOW THAT THE PROBLEM LIES WITH THE PARTNER. KNOW IT IS NOT YOUR DUTY OR REPSONSIBILITY TO HELP THEM FEEL GOOD ABOUT THEMSELVE BY USING POWER AND CONTROL OVER YOU.
I broke the cycle of fear, free from being battered, abused, emotionally,sexually and mentally. I was free from and the feeling I had to perform or I was useless as a woman and human being.
KNOW YOU’RE NOT USELESS: THAT YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO LIVE YOUR LIFE WITHOUT FEAR, WITHOUT INTIMIDATION.
YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO BE FREE FROM BEING BATTERD OR ABUSED IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM.
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